Life with PTSD — Refracting Hope

$Refracting Hope$

PTSD head.jpg — Life with PTSD

My life is spent dodging shrapnel in an invisible war that never ends. My head too full, I chaos between chaoses, ever hyper-alert in a sometimes charming and ‘together’ (but often not) type way. This is my day-to-day life with complex PTSD with all it’s interesting bits, and it’s challenges. My ordinary.

Each blog post is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

They are beloved. But they are not therapeutic

They are beloved. But they are not therapeutic

Hope Gordon2 June 2024

My Centrelink manual

My Centrelink manual

Hope Gordon20 August 2022Hope Gordon, Centrelink ptsd, Centrelink mental illness, Centrelink post traumatic stress disorder, Australian welfare ptsd, Australian welfare post traumatic stress disorder, Australia disability pension ptsd, Australia disability pension post traumatic stress disorder, Australia disability pension mental illness, welfare rules australia ptsd

Poor relationships with robots: Navigating automated appointment notification processes

Poor relationships with robots: Navigating automated appointment notification processes

Hope Gordon15 February 2022Hope Gordon, appointment reminders and PTSD, medical appointments and PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder appointments, appointments PTSD

Covid-19 Rapid Antigen Tests (RATs) and PTSD

Covid-19 Rapid Antigen Tests (RATs) and PTSD

Hope Gordon13 January 2022RAT tests, rapid antigen tests covid, RAT tests post traumatic stress, RAT tests PTSD, Hope Gordon, RAT tests Australia, RAT test issues, saliva tests covid problems, RAT test accessible, PCR tests RAT tests

Mind what you say: Responding to disclosures of PTSD or child abuse

Mind what you say: Responding to disclosures of PTSD or child abuse

Hope Gordon8 May 2021disclose child abuse, disclose ptsd, ptsd what to say, respond ptsd, respond child abuse, hope gordon, abuse what to say

I am jumpy

I am jumpy

Complex PTSD makes me hyperalert. Here is a snapshot of what that is like for me.

Hope Gordon23 March 2021post traumatic stress disorder, ptsd hypervigilence, PTSD hyperalert, hope gordon, impact of abuse, ptsd flashbacks

It is only kindness that makes sense

It is only kindness that makes sense

Hope Gordon26 January 2021kindness, PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder, vulnerable, ptsd and kindness, be kind, hope gordon, adele victoria

Masks - Not innocent fabric

Masks - Not innocent fabric

Mask wearing during COVID-19: Some tips for people with a history of trauma

Hope Gordon10 September 2020covid-19, coronavirus, masks covid, mask PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder, hope gordon, pandemic, covid PTSD, ptsd flashbacks, PTSD challenges, impact of abuse, child abuse masks, childhood trauma

Two faced: Lack of affect

Two faced: Lack of affect

An explanation for all who have ever wondered about my blank face.

Hope Gordon18 August 2020PTSD affect, lack of affect, post traumatic stress disorder, child abuse, hope gordon, PTSD emotions, PTSD relationship, PTSD communication, abuse coping mechanism

A COVID-19 fog

A COVID-19 fog

COVID-19 has been like a fog.

Hope Gordon7 July 2020covid-19, covid PTSD, coronavirus, post traumatic stress disorder, pandemic, covid trauma, hope gordon

PTSD, communication and COVID-19

PTSD, communication and COVID-19

Complex PTSD makes using technology such as Face Time and Zoom challenging as I try to cope in this COVID-19 world.

Hope Gordon22 May 2020covid-19, coronavirus, PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder, child abuse, social distancing, covid communication, pandemic, hope gordon, covid PTSD, covid ptsd, PTSD challenges, impact of abuse

Inside my chaotic head

Inside my chaotic head

A snapshot of my messy head.

Hope Gordon22 May 2020thought process PTSD, self talk PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder, hope gordon, PTSD challenges, impact of abuse

Flashbacks - What are they like?

Flashbacks - What are they like?

This is what it feels like when I have a flashback

Hope Gordon3 April 2020flashbacks, child abuse, childhood trauma, post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD, hope gordon, ptsd flashbacks, PTSD challenges, ptsd hypervigilence, PTSD hyperalert, PTSD coping

Abuse cycles - Child to adult

Abuse cycles - Child to adult

It is easy for abused children to fall into toxic adult relationships. Without even realising it.

Hope Gordon1 April 2020abuse cycles, PTSD relationship, childhood trauma, hope gordon, domestic violence

PTSD in a pandemic 3 (COVID-19 in Australia): Chaos and PTSD don't mix

PTSD in a pandemic 3 (COVID-19 in Australia): Chaos and PTSD don't mix

The more those around me are agitated in this COVID-19 world, the worse my complex PTSD.

Hope Gordon19 March 2020covid-19, coronavirus, PTSD covid, post traumatic stress disorder, pandemic PTSD, hope gordon, childhood trauma covid, PTSD challenges, PTSD coping, ptsd hypervigilence, PTSD hyperalert

PTSD in a pandemic 2 (COVID-19 in Australia): Preparing for a pandemic

PTSD in a pandemic 2 (COVID-19 in Australia): Preparing for a pandemic

Sometimes fear paralyses. I am not stripping supermarket shelves. I am not prepared for this pandemic. Not at all.

Hope Gordon18 March 2020covid-19, coronavirus, covid PTSD, pandemic PTSD, pandemic, hope gordon, childhood trauma covid, PTSD coping, PTSD challenges

PTSD in a pandemic 1 (COVID-19 in Australia): Impact of childhood trauma

PTSD in a pandemic 1 (COVID-19 in Australia): Impact of childhood trauma

COVID-19 is not a virus to me - it is my father, and I am now reliving my childhood.

Hope Gordon17 March 2020covid-19, coronavirus, covid PTSD, childhood trauma covid, pandemic, post traumatic stress disorder, hope gordon, impact of abuse

Dissociation

Dissociation

Dissociation, in a nutshell

Hope Gordon16 March 2020dissociation ptsd, dissociation, post traumatic stress disorder, childhood trauma, child abuse, hope gordon, abuse coping mechanism, impact of abuse

Casing the joint with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Casing the joint with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

Always sussing out the environment for potential danger, I never, ever relax.

Hope Gordon16 March 2020PTSD hyperalert, PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder, PTSD relationship, ptsd hypervigilence, hope gordon, impact of abuse, PTSD challenges

Dissociation - Social situations

Dissociation - Social situations

Social situations can be stressful for people with a history of trauma. These are a few things which may be helpful.

Hope Gordon16 March 2020dissociation ptsd, dissociation, post traumatic stress disorder, ptsd social situations, dissociation social, hope gordon, PTSD relationship, PTSD coping, PTSD challenges, impact of abuse